North Korea, Best Korea!
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize