even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize
