def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Randomize
