Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
nothing like a cross blunt to celebrate the birth of our savior
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
Randomize
