Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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