Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
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