so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?
Most definitely.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Randomize
