Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
I'm not sure that our 12-years-ago-high-school-"relationship," and 179 texts in the last 4 hours is gonna be enough to squeeze a naked smartphone picture of me. I'm gonna need some chicken wings or Makers Mark before that starts happening.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
Randomize
