remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
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