i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
