You're a womanizer and a bitch.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Randomize
