A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
Remember when I referred to my box of wine as my briefcase and made all of those stupid jokes about working overtime? Thanks for ignoring my cry for help.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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