she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Randomize
