So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
I am available for nakedness
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
