I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
That's the last time you call me to prove to some girl at a bar that you're English. It's bad enough that you actually get to fuck them because of it without having to wake me up to seal the deal.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
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