then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
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