Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
He felt like a one man threesome
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Is it horrible that I want to keep my purple landing strip until after my gyno apt? I feel like someone beside myself should see it...
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
