I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
