great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
She's opening her family birthday cards at the bar. So we can pay our tab. Bitches wrote checks :(
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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