What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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