How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
Randomize
