Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
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