Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
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