I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize