i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
