I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
i think i scared a bird with my dick
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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