i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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