OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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