I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
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