I love black thongs
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
