Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
Got hit on at a funeral service by cougar. I think I just got Reverse Will Ferrell'd.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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