Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
