Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Whatever. I hate you. My vagina hates you. I hope a bird shits on your head today.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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