he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize