your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Pounded a bottle of Moscato in my underwear while watching Pretty Little Liars...am I really gonna be 30 next year?
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Randomize
