fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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