Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize
