whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
