ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
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