U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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