Jerry, you need to find god
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
