Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
even my farts smell like vagina
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Randomize
