That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Cancel your plans for the fourth someone is streaming iron chef on twitch
Randomize
