He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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