what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
Randomize