I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
it hurts more in the daytime
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
