fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
i now understand why vodka
Randomize
