is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Randomize
