wake up i wanna do it froggy style
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
So I come back home and a huge flock of enormous vultures are on my roof
They're waiting for you to die
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
How does one acquire holy water?
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
Randomize
