Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
Randomize
